Crazy Brown: How common it is to say hello before noon! Crown (Season 4) second piece

1st scene

Prince Charles (embarrassed and painful look): I – I – I don’t know how to put it. Really the most awkward! But what are you, of, of – I’m sorry, but I can’t remember your name very much for my life!

Diana: Diana!

Prince Charles: How clever you are. I know it started with ‘D’. So – where was I? – Will you get me wrong?

Diana: Diana!

Prince Charles: Yes, you, Diana, will marry – as it were – me?

Diana: Oh, yes! Oh, Charles! This is the happiest day of my life!

‘The Crown’ didn’t do season 4 Emma with Josh O’Connor

Prince Charles: Not Charles. Sir

Diana: This is the happiest day of my life, sir!

Prince Charles: There must have been more happy days. It was not hated. I think this is the time we ‘got to know each other’. Whatever that means. So. Tell me about yourself. Have you come too far?

Diana: Well, I’m 19 and I’m absolutely M.Ed with George Michael.

Prince Charles: Mars, this time? Of course I’ll be quiet!

Enter Butler

Butler: Mrs. Parker Boles is on the phone, your Royal Highness!

Prince Charles: Tell him I’m busy.

Butler: Of course sir. (Turning to Diana): The Prince of Wales is busy.

SCENE 2

Living room at Buckingham Palace. Prince Charles crouched in the corner, his head in his hands. In badminton training, Princess Anne kept peace around her hobby horse house. Prince Philip is hardworking, cutting off his head from a dead rock. Princess Margaret sighed. The queen mother spreads a rabbit’s skin while resting comfortably in her favorite arm chair, her friend Diana’s grandmother Ruth, Lady Fermoy, gently pulls a flying wing.

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Ruth, Lady Fermoy: It’s for your own good. Wings are so desperate!

Enter Diana.

Diana: Hello, Granny!

Taking a sharp breath from the whole family.

Princess Margaret: Can you believe it ?! He said ‘hello’!

Princess Ann: A true royal never knows how to say ‘hello’ before noon!

Prince Philip: What world is coming?

Queen Mother: And – for heaven! – No one should ever say ‘Granny’ if there is no ‘R’ in the month. Just ‘Grandma’. A strict transformation of this young girl is most urgently needed. Can Barbara Woodhouse be found?

Diana (looking at Charles in the corner): Hello sir!

Prince Charles: Have you come too far? Keep you busy, isn’t it?

SCENE 3

Ruth, Lady Fermoy is strict in training Diana to be more royal.

Diana: ‘What a brown cow now.’

Ruth, Lady Fermoy: Stupid girl! No one ever engages in a conversation with a cow. After inspecting the farm, the senior horse should be addressed first and then the senior sheep, senior pig and senior chicken in order of priority.

Of course, each category has a specific individual order. From the chicken side, for example, some Norfolk will not address an Orpington before Gray, and if a Derbyshire Redcap was present, he would certainly meet the expectations and qualifications of an individual listener. Diana – All right, isn’t it?

At this moment, Ruth, the Lady, marches outside Fermoy. Sounds like a shot. He re-enters, carrying a dead stag.

Ruth, Lady Fermoy: And, of course, the dead style predominates over the wife of the Duke’s youngest son, except in Scotland, where the wife of the Knight Grand Cross of Thistle has to court the younger son. Daughter of Lord Advocate. Of course, unless a doctor’s certificate is available.

Skin 4

Westminster Abbey. Wedding rehearsal.

Archbishop of Canterbury: Charles Philip Arthur George, can you make this woman your legally married wife?

Prince Charles: If I must.

Diana: You don’t sound very enthusiastic, Charles.

Queen Mother: Doesn’t she know that it’s very common to hear enthusiastic? His great uncle David showed enthusiasm – and see what happened to him.

Scene 5

Abbey out. Prince Charles and Lady Diana are both in tears.

QUEEN: Well that all went awry, I thought.

Queen Mother: I don’t think I’ve ever seen a happy couple!

Prince Philip: The real wedding is tomorrow, so let’s keep Diana locked up until then. In that case he got the ‘last minute jitter’, okay.

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About the Author: Rusty Kemp

Tv ninja. Lifelong analyst. Award-winning music evangelist. Professional beer buff. Incurable zombie specialist.

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